Frequently Asked Questions

How Can I Protect My Child From Being Sexually Abused?

• Know your Child. Know their moods, behaviors, where they are and who they are with.
Check references and backgrounds of potential babysitters. Meet your child’s friend’s parents.
• Talk to your child often and let them know they can tell you anything and you will believe them.
• Teach your child from very early age about the proper names for their body parts and that no one should touch their privates. Teach your child about safe and unsafe touches.
• Let your child know that it is ok for them to tell an adult no about touches they do not want. Do not force your child to hug or kiss people they don’t want to.
• If your child tells you about being abused, believe them! Children often try to tell in little ways but will not fully disclose if they feel they aren’t believed.

How Can I Help My Child If They Have Been Abused?

The time after a disclosure of abuse is difficult and emotional for everyone. The positive support your child receives from you is one of the most important things you can do at that time. The child will cope best and heal from the abuse easier when he or she:

• IS BELIEVED-Tell your child that you believe her and you are glad she told. Make sure you let them know that they did the right thing by telling and they are not to blame for the abuse.
• FEELS SAFE AND PROTECTED-Parents need to provide both emotional and physical protection to their child. The child will be frightened by ranting, threatening anger towards the perpetrator. Be honest with your emotions but don’t let them observe you crying all of the time. The child often thinks she made you cry by disclosing.
• DOES NOT FEEL GUILTY-Remember the child is never to blame. The child should not feel ashamed about what happened to him. Remember the molester is often someone the child loves and cares for. He may have mixed feelings about him still. Talk about the inappropriate behavior the molester did rather than on the molester.
• HAS GOOD SELF ESTEEM-Parents, other family members, teachers, and counselors can help the child overcome her feelings of powerlessness and worthlessness that many abused children feel. Avoid negative criticism of your child and encourage her to try new things and experience success.
• FEELS ACCEPTED AND LOVED-A child’s disclosure of abuse is often scary and associated with acting out behaviors. It is usual for the child to have been threatened, coerced or bribed to remain silent. As a result of the abuse you may see behaviors such as anger, nightmares, bedwetting, clinging or excessive crying. Be patient with your child through this time.
• Fear of being alone with a certain person
• GETS THERAPY TO DEAL WITH THE ABUSE-We believe that every abused child should receive counseling to help them deal with the effects of the abuse and to get beyond this trauma. Some children only need a short amount of counseling while other children may need months and years.